I will no longer scrape the marrow from my bones
Make them hollow
So that you have a place to stay
Call these bones your home
While I am trying to make castles out of dirt
Mud
Clinging to the under nail
Like I cling to self worth
Because I know
That when my ravaged body falls to the ground you’ll keep going
Prey
Not on knees but on souls
Reaping riches from the twinkles in their eyes
Diamonds to you
Fashion a necklace of stolen joy
That dances in the light like they used to when they
Felt music from with within
You
Replaced the rosebuds the Lord planted in my cheeks
And left in my garden pale, dying weeds
Occupying my body
My temple
My home
When I didn’t even even invite you in
You didn’t knock
You slipped through the window on a night I didn’t lock it tightly
And when I tried to kick you out
You claimed squatters rights
Fed on my blood
Like I
Owed you half my portion
Well I’m tired
Of drawing the curtains
So that people can’t see the circles you leave under my eyes
I wanna let the sunshine in
They Notice the veins,
My withering foundation
Collapsing
I refuse to fall with them anymore
I’m not making excuses for you anymore
I won’t tell friends you just needed a place to stay
you’re just down on your luck
Figuring yourself out
Coming into your own
That mine was the only home with a vacancy
Because you’re choking me
There’s not enough room
in these walls
For the both of us
I am evicting you
So that
When everyone else sees beauty in me
I will see it too
I’ll see my smiling face in the mirror
Without you lurking behind me
With your shifting identities
They Call you self loathing
They Call you self consciousness
They Call you self hate
I’ll call you dead
Or better yet
I won’t call you at all
You never had a landline anyway
